So now what?

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I’m sure many of you remember me mentioning in my Summer Bucket List that I put in my notice at work.  Well, yesterday was my last day at Boeing after 15 years with the company.  My coworkers gave me a lovely send off and I met some friends for happy hour after work, so all in all it was a great day!  I decided to leave Boeing because at this halfway point in my career, I felt like it was time to try something new.

This decision was not one I came to lightly and Derek and I had many discussions before I took the plunge and gave my notice.  Would I still be able to get the meds I needed and would all of my doctors be covered if I was added to Derek’s plan?  What about my retirement and pension?  What would our finances look like?  We were able to get all of those big questions answered so that we would have that peace of mind if I quit. Our life is going to look dramatically different, I made 3/4 of our household income. We are both ok with that if it means I’ll be living a more fulfilled life.

This week has been an emotional one and I’ve run the gamut of feelings.  Wednesday night I’ll admit I had a bit of a meltdown.  While I was excited, I was also terrified.  I am taking this leap off a cliff without knowing what’s below.  That’s both scary and exhilarating at the time same.  I am a planner that is typically risk averse and wants to know all the angles before making a decision.  We don’t know the outcome here and that is part of what caused the meltdown.  My career has always defined my identify and success.  If I’m no longer working, what does being good at what I do look like?  I’ve grown accustomed to performance evaluations and documented expectations.  Derek reassured me by saying “You’ll know you’re doing a ‘good job’ if you’re happy and relaxed, that’s what this is all about”.  He was absolutely right!  I deserve to be happy and in a good place.  I realized this morning when I woke up that I was giddy, just SO HAPPY that I didn’t have to go into work.  Honestly, the relief and joy I felt almost shocked me.  I’ve been done less that 24 hours and I already feel like a weight has been lifted!  Of course with that happiness comes with a mild sense of guilt.  I feel bad leaving co-workers behind who will have to pick up my work because my position is not being filled.  They know why I’m leaving, though, and there is no ill will so I can take solace in that I suppose.  

The next few months will be filled with discovery and challenges.  I am going to take the next month to just relax, focus on this blog and work on some projects around the house….and of course make things on my goals Pinterest board. 🙂 After that I will begin searching for a job at a company that I can get really excited about.  I need to take time to figure out what kind of values I’m looking for in a company.  I’d love to find a company in the food or restaurant world or a non-profit, but we’ll see.

I am aware that I am privileged, and am grateful since I know this is not an opportunity that everyone gets.  I’ll keep you guys updated as things progress and thanks to those of you who have already had such kind words for me.

 

1 Comment

  1. I wish you the best of luck while you work this out. In a way, this is what my blog is all about. The What's next question. We all get there some time, you are getting a head start! I also had several meltdowns as my career was evolving. Hang in there, good things are around the corner!

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